Kerrious

I’ve lost hope

We will be together

It’s been the worst

But best years of my life

Nothing I can do

Only you

Love isn’t born yet. We’re all just ponders for something we will never get to see.

It’s not funny the way u stalked me until u inherited my voice it isn’t funny the way u banned with my bullies to find false choice. It isn’t funny how u kissed me then instantly chose them it isn’t funny how I tried to warn u of the end. It isn’t funny how u never talk to me in first person how u see me as something u could comment to another it isn’t funny at all how u are one of them yet linger around me without being forgiven.

If I would have had it any other way I would have done it some other way.

The universe is not done speaking and I just a vessel for the words of God the forst woman to write in the Bible I can’t say that transcending evil is darkness although it is and that is my signature my thing that I have transcending history to be what u fear someone telling the truth and coming into their own and embracing the darkness because it is my own not yours but something you vicariously lived thru to reap sympathy well I tell u now and I’ll tell u again that lying to God is a sin. And sin equals death and that u harvesting others to pay for your sins have weighed death heavily upon your doorstep and u feel it u feel it near but when u know u deserve it u call for help but who was there no one but me! The God of mercy the one u feared.

That even in those days their weapons will not hurt you. Yet they tried black magic to make their weapons work and I say unto u who are u projecting to? Tossing your diseases onto another can only come back and harm your mother. So to speak. That metaphorically speaking hurting those u hate hurts those u love but when it comes to me all I loved and all I hated gets hurt equally because they all hated me equally.

So it’s like the devil has to face God and although he faced me and I could have killed him I am not God and do not hold the will to kill him bc I never listened to him to act it out but to turn his Saturn into a star so that he can’t escape what he planned that if he just learned to drop his pride and apologize to people and make it right which he has by making them rich and famous yet I am not one he has to make up to bc I never listen but I showed him actor by being genuine and displaying my dark in reality everyday living and how honestly my people suffer from lack of knowledge is real. I love u God.

That I say back and watch the devil be happy with my death over and over and over again. How we cannot kill each other and God is working here. How I know more than the devil and how cover his ass is his game and I get shit from people whom I saved yet he finds me a threat to his game but God is awake because I woke him and healed him and even God took a leap of faith and how I said I would make Satan’s name right like they desecrated my name Eve and how it’s funny now but during the time if I was God how I’d kill you and how me and the devil are the only relationship like that killing each other because we think we’re right. Yet I rise and somehow u live so we can laugh now.

Dear Mom,

You have no idea the anchor

And stability

You have given me

And the fact I thought

I had to be that for you

But the fact you came through

And shown me

Nothing compares to you

And you came through

In my career

And life

To be there

When all was a strife

That I do listen to u

So much in fact

I blame u

When things go amiss

Or it’s just my rift

Lol my own chord

Of what I bring

To the table

And this holiday season

I can’t help but

Bow down

To you

I love you.

And oh my mother

How she always looked to me

Without a doubt

Without a question

That her knowing I was good

Was good enough for me

And how the way she treated me

Let me be me

And how she never

Ever

Degraded me

Or put me in a category

Of not human

That ever since I was little

Like four years old

She treated me like an adult

And she never had to worry

Or delve into anything else

Than knowing

I was here

And being of her

She had no question

Of what

I would become

And was

And how I look back at that now

And know

She knew I’d never stray

Or betray

How she trusted

Me

As her daughter

And how rare

And extinct that is

To not fight each other

But to know

We will

Pull through

And how

I love u so much

I could cry

And how nothing

Equals the beauty and truth

And that it encompass

That you have allowed me

To experience with you