One of these days I’ll be able to write down the truth from beginning to end. But I know God doesn’t have the internet so what’s the point?
But one day I’ll come here to vent in hopes it’ll help someone else understand this time.
When I can drop all acts and all protective layers and all authority and truths I can’t yet expose. Tactile in nature yet not true life. But a deception technique that was only used on themselves.
That I now know what it’s like to witness the soulless and the ruined. And how I can do anything but I won’t. I could forget my worth or I could live it. That sometimes those with this degenerative disease are better left forgotten and not even the best heart would care but the best heart would want to know hell is real. To feel loved in return. And only in a way that God can explain through years of explaining himself and everything I could argue with just by sheer naivety that they could leave me alone long enough to do the right thing but instead I see them in hell, burning and ceasing to exist because that is the power of God and the last time I’ll have to turn my cheek.
because it is not then I am fighting for not ever have but rather questions coming out in the form of frustration through being condemned as if me and the enemy could trade places that they will get the reward and I will burn. But rather frustration to know id rather skip all the questions and answers and these years of meaningless endeavors bestowed on me by others due to their lifetimes of deluding themselves into thinking they have purpose other than to burn for choosing evil. They think they can integrate me into their story but we are so far apart but yet they think we are close.
But being put in a situation I would never put myself in willingly or being put in this situation that suits me not as not one ounce of my being is similar or attracted to their better off dead beings. As in it’s so the reason why people go to hell and never come out or are spoken of again or thought of again. Yet they think they are driving me insane when rather it reminds me I am sane.
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