Kerrious

When Curiosity Doesn't Kill You……YOU LEARN. More Than Just a Breathe of Fresh Air

It’s like handing over everything you ever worked for

For voices

That I already lost everything

Before I saw it fall apart

And dissipate

Like my appreciation

For love and beauty

It’s like losing

Before you know you lost

So you put up a grand fight

And they fight back

That all the evidence and clues

Amount up to losing anyway

So I say take it

Help me disappear.

help the world forget me

Including my friends and family

Take away everything I love

And find beautiful

And see if it’s still there

It’s like having an art gallery

Destroyed

A home destroyed

A planet

A universe

That in all essence

It means

I’m not allowed to be human

I’m not allowed to hurt

Or cry

Or live

Or die

I’m not allowed

To be human

Because I was always young

Full of distractions

From what it meant .

But the pain of having your creations destroyed

Is the same as losing a child

Same pain

Same feelings

A longing in your heart and soul

For things you can never reach again

Because you don’t know where they are anymore

The future is uncertain

And so isn’t what happens after death and destruction

And yet I have to hold the pain

When I shouldn’t even feel it yet

It’s like being in the afterlife

And watching your life

And what people do behind your back

What they really think

How can the truth be brainwash?

It’s not

It’s just more painful

And harder to hold

That they win

Nothing more

Than pain.

Their creation is pain

And mine happiness

But neither should exist

If I can’t have my happiness

Than they shouldn’t get their pain

But I am like a tragedy

All tragedies

That ever existed

Exist in me

And now I know

What the look on people’s face mean

That they are sad for me

And if I let go of blaming myself

I can feel sad for me too

Everyday brings more reason

To just let go

Of everything

And remain alone

As I’ve always been

But sometimes just trying

And witnessing a hope

Can only cause the futile attempts

That are really false hopes

Over and over again

Like I am torturing myself

Just by trying

Just by giving people chances

But if they want to just leave me here

To suffer

With the voices

And how someone who believed in everything

Can become surrounded by those who don’t believe in anything

Than I’ve really been abandoned

And that I was right about everyone

In my life

And there’s no future

That’ll make them see or believe in me

They’ve hurt me the most

And the voices are just here

To hide the evidence

That I ever meant anything to anyone

But in my memories

Are the truth

That right when I need something

No one is there

It’s everyone opportunity

To kill me slowly

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