i believe i have a right
to fight in self defense
i will draw my black sword
and dawn my black wings
and paint myself blue
just to disappoint you
you ignored my most important prayer
left me there bare
not like you care
didn’t trust me?
why should i trust you?
didn’t listen?
why should i listen to you?
didn’t read it?
why should i read you?
why should i do anything at all
to save you
why should i do anything besides
watch you try to kill me
fallen by wrath
and pride
dead on arrival
wanted you
needed you
but what i came to find out
is you hated me
or was it an act?
i have to ask.
so much faith down the drain
a mutual understanding?
from the universe
a mutual agreement
from my friends
i just wanted to be yor friend
except you filled my head
with darkness
things that could be true
or things that aren’t
it could go either way
i don’t play with scales
i’d rather go to hell
then pretend to be just
pretend to be fair
pretend to care
i’d rather grow cold
and grow old
than pretend i made a mistake
and maybe i did
sometimes i think it would be better off
destructed into oblivion
and i dream of ashes
devouring the planet
but they look to me like a God
doesn’t mean i told them too
why punish me if they worship me?
i didn’t plan it
why can’t i be loved?
and why must they all die?
who are you?
but a king?
telling me you save?
but have you yet?
i’m filled with regret
for relying on an imaginary friend
in my heart in not enough
my lips was not enough
for i know i’d rather live with my mistakes
than be tortured
and crippled
but when i look to the light
it is enough
but i can’t do this myself
an imagination can’t do harm
it’s innocence at work
but still they live
God will not stop letting me down
arrogance
or is it plain pride
that people are hypocrites because god is a hypocrite
that i do the very things
that piss me off in other people
minor details of inventory tossed out
my heart breaks
that i’m not enough
for people to listen
my heart breaks
that the very people i saved
tossed me away
my collaboration with God
is ruined
my creation
turned on me
and i know what it feels like to be God
like we have lived the same lives
it should be enough
but i have it rough
you give people what they want
and they shout more
so i hate God
for making humans
and really i hate humans
for thinking they’re special
for not appreciating me
for all they’ve done to me
while on earth
so tell me ?
i can be as hateful and angry as i want forever
and i’ll still go to heaven
bitch.