Times of war are elusive. Just like the very soldiers that fight them. Recluse serve any elusive and hermits In their own right. It’s a choice. It’s being called and being chosen and few are chosen. And as I read that I heard the call and I answered began to understand more clearly where all of this was coming from beginning to understand myself more clearly. I’m still a mystery and I’m trying to unwrap that mystery to be the first one to discover myself and not let them do it. I am a sovereign nation where I discover myself. A whole nation based solely on discovering what it means to be human essentially. Giving women and humans a good name. While keeping my reputation intact. Keeping my name sacred. Living up to its true meaning. Disease-free and Quarantined. I wait for another to inhabit my nation with my garden. And not make the same mistakes as my ancestors. While learning from the best parts of history and tossing the worst parts in the trash. To not repeat history but make history and all the best parts make the future and I’d like to think I’m part of that best part that is going to create the future my future. How can I be denied a future? If I am it’s discrimination. Breaking the barriers of social boundaries and racism and misunderstandings. Freeing myself from the misconceptions plaquad by the media. And exposing myself to the truth a better truth. That somehow it just all fits it fits perfectly. I originated in Syria and the Philippines and that is a gift in itself because of the woman I am today. Beautiful and strong. Beautiful enough to say no and strong enough to let go. So I time traveled while remaining in the present being in two different places at once. Back to when I was 16 and now when I’m 30 to decipher my real messages without doing anything hasty. Self-discipline and self-control is my specialty. That really some parts of myself I did have to tame due to the overwhelming effect it had on me. That there are consequences to every action especially if you have a conscience. Especially if you know you’re better than the things you were doing. And you’re better than the things they want you to do. You’re better than anything they could ever do with you. Mothering The world and being there through the birth pains like a nurse and the mother all in one allowing the grandmother to teach and learn from myself. So even my own inspiration comes from myself self-control and self sufficient.